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Roger, all,
Another option is to delete the problematic sentence, noting
the current following sentence:
"IEEE 802 invites ISO/IEC JTC1/SC6/WG1 to provide a Liaison Statement to IEEE 802 that highlights its perspective on
how the IEEE 802.3 and IEEE 802.11 standards can be improved to better meet industrial networking needs. We hope that this would then become the basis of ongoing collaboration.
------------------------ Dorothy Stanley Hewlett Packard Enterprise +1 630-363-1389 From: ***** IEEE 802 Executive Committee List ***** <STDS-802-SEC@listserv.ieee.org> on behalf of Stanley, Dorothy <dorothy.stanley@HPE.COM>
Sent: Thursday, January 27, 2022 8:46 AM To: STDS-802-SEC@LISTSERV.IEEE.ORG <STDS-802-SEC@LISTSERV.IEEE.ORG> Subject: Re: [802SEC] +++ ECM (early close) +++ ballot on Liaison to ISO/IEC JTC1/SC6 Re: PWI for Deterministic Wireless Industrial Network Ballot opens 2022-01-25
Hello Roger,
I appreciate your comments. I expect that most if not all your editorial suggestions will be accepted as part of the final editing.
Regarding the text change proposed as the basis of your negative vote, I accept that the first sentence potentially can be improved;
however I don't think the proposed sentence is quite there.
<snip>
Current sentence:
IEEE 802 requests that ISO/IEC JTC1/SC6/WG1 focus its industrial networking efforts on assisting IEEE 802 to refine its solutions,
rather than focusing efforts on yet another wireless network solution.
RBM proposed replacement:
IEEE 802 suggests that the goals of ISO/IEC JTC1/SC6/WG1 in industrial networking would be most efficiently achieved by engagement with IEEE 802 and aiding in the refinement of IEEE 802 technology.
[Note: The comment on this sentence is the only basis of my Disapprove vote.]
Comment:
Is the underlying issue use of the work "requests"?
Perhaps something along the lines of:
"IEEE 802 invites ISO/IEC/JTC1/SC6/WG1 to engage with IEEE 802 to refine IEEE 802 technology based solutions."
or
"IEEE 802 invites ISO/IEC/JTC1/SC6/WG1 to assist IEEE 802 in refining its solutions, rather than focusing efforts on a separate, potentially overlapping solution."
Dorothy
------------------------ Dorothy Stanley Hewlett Packard Enterprise +1 630-363-1389 From: ***** IEEE 802 Executive Committee List ***** <STDS-802-SEC@listserv.ieee.org> on behalf of Roger Marks <r.b.marks@IEEE.ORG>
Sent: Wednesday, January 26, 2022 3:05 PM To: STDS-802-SEC@LISTSERV.IEEE.ORG <STDS-802-SEC@LISTSERV.IEEE.ORG> Subject: Re: [802SEC] +++ ECM (early close) +++ ballot on Liaison to ISO/IEC JTC1/SC6 Re: PWI for Deterministic Wireless Industrial Network Ballot opens 2022-01-25 Dorothy,
I vote Disapprove. I’ve attached comments. My Disapprove is based only on the final paragraph. The rest of the comments are editorial. Cheers,
Roger
On Jan 25, 2022, 12:05 PM -0700, Stanley, Dorothy <dorothy.stanley@hpe.com>, wrote:
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